YOUR COMMENTS

Our Manchester High Schools have the highest rate of pregnancy. Some girls have 2 babies. Few will ever get off the dole. Course, few are even married. Some is due to supervision. The Moms who let guys stay overnight with their daughters. Moms who spend a weekend/week at some man's house and leave their own teenagers to their own amusements. Who agree to be "exclusive" and give the milk away for free. Or the men who say they're exclusive but have 2 more women on the side. They want a woman to mommy the kids, cook, nurse them, pay the bills. And laugh at the woman who actually believes they're not cheating. Why should the kids have any higher morals?
- Framkie, Manchester

Proponents of abstinence-until-marriage education that do not also teach kids how to use contraception are living in a fantasy world. Not every married couple wants children, and not every married couple wants a bunch of children. Even if kids who are taught abstinence and no other birth control method do end up waiting until marriage to have sex, they're still going to be ignorant of how to use contraception and prevent unintended pregnancy (yes, even married couples have unintended pregnancies!).

It's difficult enough trying to get teens and even adults to protect themselves because of myths they've been taught by their uninformed friends about contraception (like sex feels better without condoms). Focusing on only the failure rates of contraception (or downright lying about the effects) will only increase the numbers of STDs and unintended pregnancies. People have to learn that sex is not shameful and that contraception is healthy -- before they start having sex.
- Emily, Clifton, NJ

Judy,
I applaud the fact that you are going to have an active dialog with your kids and yes your are a hundred and fifty percent correct that even good kids will "rebel" against their parent principles. The real question is who and what should be taught to our young children about sex. I do plan on have an active dialog with my son and my daughter about sex; it's intimacy and the potential gravity if taken lightly. What I don't want, and what I believe this is the cusp of the abstinence oriented education stand, is my son or daughter with hormones raging to be given explicit directions with the consequences loosely discussed or taught that sex is just the "norm" and cannot be controlled. When I was 16, it was hard enough to see past tomorrow; it seems like a bad combination to promote sexual responsibility without promoting the crap out of what the consequences can (and in many cases) will be. As parents, we should be teaching our kids how to move away from childish behaviors of being "out of control" and into adult behaviors of understand the consequence to our actions.
- Nate B, Franklin

UL, can you close that italics at the end of the article, it is annoying. Thanks. (EDITOR'S NOTE: Thanks for pointing it out.)

I agree with DM from Hampton. I have 2 children and plan on having an active dialog and attentive parenting when they are teenagers but I cannot get over all the former teenagers here who think the new generation should or can just squash their natural human instincts. They are sexually active as teenagers because their hormones are out of control. How many times do you have to be told that emotions and hormones outweigh logical thought at this age. How many times do you have to be told that even SOME good kids don't care what you think (no matter that you are the best mommy and daddy on the planet and go to church Sunday, Wednesday and Saturday), they care what they feel and it is it over rides all logic. Some are going to have sex. You will never stop it. You might stop the earth turning easier. Why do you think parents stoop to brainwashing and promises of eternal hell to keep kids in line? Only the threat of a very painful death or mommy and daddy won't love you anymore will deter some teenagers from sex and then some will still think it is worth the risk. Honestly, what part of the brain are you adults thinking with? Safe sex needs to be taught. I do question some of the above statements about "How to make condoms fun". What age is that being taught? There is a huge difference between a 14yr old and a 18yr old. Or is it really? I can't help but feel that is one for Snopes.
- Judy, Pembroke

I wonder if much of these societal changes can be related to television celebrating homosexuality, pornography, and using sex and cleavage to sell anything. What message is all this to our young women who now seem to have no regard for their bodies. They are being taught to use them to get whatever they want. Look at the results.
- Mike, Nottingham

Nate B. and Deirdre Taylor running neck and neck for Post of the Day award.
Nate,if only I had it as together as you seem to have,at 26,I could have saved myself alot of school of hard knocks class-time.
Caitlain,did you fall down?Please come back,we still love your mis-guided self.
- Mike P., Manchester

I read the same report that Susan did. According to that report, states are finding the abstinence programs don't help.

It can be tough trying to get humans to not act human.
- DM, Hampton

The primary cause of the rise in teen pregnancies is bad parenting. Period. Nothing is more irresponsible than having parents blame eveyone else but themselves.
- steve boyington, Chester

Funny, I was just reading an article, yesterday, about the proliferation of abstinence-only instruction that the Bush-led government has been pushing for years. Despite many states accepting federal funds to run such programs, the teen pregnancy and STD rate has risen. Many states are dropping out of the program and foregoing federal funds because abstinence-only education is a failure. Clearly, this isn't all about "comprehensive sex education".
- Susan, Raymond

To start, I'm for an abstinence oriented sex ed program.

We have a culture that actively promotes young sexuality; if you don't believe me, just look at the clothing that is marketed to young girls. Kid are bombarded with shows geared to young viewers promoting intimate relationships and deep romance. Then, to top it off, we give them all the information to have sex at an age without ever mentioning the fact that sex changes everything. What blows my mind, is that in a society where we regulate the sale of alcohol and cigarettes because we deem children not mentally and physically prepared to consume, we actively peddle sex like it was as harmless as drinking water.

In the end though, the greatest preventive is parental involvement. I'm 26, and I can't tell you how many stupid decisions I made when I was 18, let alone younger. I've got a young daughter, and I will be a hard ass when it come to dress and viewing habits (don't worry, my son won't be exempt from this either). This isn't going to be done so I can get some jolly's or take out any pent up anger over my childhood, rather this is so my kids can preserve some innocence in a society that all but flaunts the lack of innocence.
- Nate B, Franklin

Today's children are lost. Why? Because we have allowed self serving socialist groups to dictate what is best for our families and children for decades now. The very problems they claim to have the solutions to are problems brought on by their brilliant ideas in the first place. Thanks, for the decades of promoting irresponsible sexual behaviours, single parent households, dumbed down academics for social engineering and marginilizing the importance of parental involvement. Not hard to see how we got here. No wonder kids these days are so lost and disfunctional. Wake up folks! These "for the children" groups and our government do not care about your children. Your children are merely pawns in social experiments that serve to empower the government over us and those progressive groups that stand to gain from it. Parents, ask yourselves how much authority and rights over your children you have lost over the decades of social engineering. Seems the government has more rights over YOUR children than you do....because that's always in your children's best interest, right? Stop looking to the government and progressives to "care" about your children and guide them - that's your job. Please, I beg, stop believing these people have the answers and remember they are the ones that cultivated the problems we are having today.
- Deirdre' Taylor, Goffstown, NH

Jim, I agree with you, but I also need to point one thing out. Where is the parental involvement? Who is LETTING those kids dress and act like that? Why is it OK? Are the parents worried that their kid won't think they're "cool"?
- Mary, Manchester NH

I’ve been tagged here as a “liberal” however on this issue I think we need to have a closer look at what’s really going on. I have no issue with teaching abstinence along with current sex education as long as it’s all based on facts.

There’s a strange turning of tables going on in the schools today and I think it deserves some attention. Today the young ladies are the aggressors, some are absolutely boy crazy and literally throwing themselves at the boys. The children involved in this are younger and their bodies are developing much earlier. All you have to do in some cases is stand in the right spot at the right time and you’ll get a girl. Pleas don’t assume I’m calling all young girls whores that’s not my point all I’m saying is that I’ve observed a trend. Just go talk to some upper middle school and high school teachers, these kids hormones are completely out of control.

The other thing is the clothes they wear, I’ve seen skirts that can only be defined as a wide belt with panties poking out under it strutting down the hallway and it’s very common. This is distracting to the educational process for all involved. I hate to say this but I think a reasonable dress code needs to be implemented.

I think we need to look into the hormones and chemicals in our food and water. The growth hormones being pumped into our meat has to end up somewhere and this is just a theory mind you but I think it may be on your dinner table.

Just my two cents.
- Jim, Raymond NH

Where in this op-ed does the author proscribe abstinence-ONLY education? I don't see. She does talk about abstinence-centered. This would also leave open space for comprehensive sex ed as well.

The most beneficial education would promote both versions, with concentration on abstinence. All the information should be shared, but abstinence must be the focus as this is the only true way to prevent 100% unwanted pregnancy and the proliferation of STDs.

If abstinence education prevents 1 teen pregnancy, it is worth the funding. For those who disagree, you truly are morons.
- Danny, Manchester

Caitlain,"make up statistics","every single study","wholly ineffective"????
Yeah,your new,hip,with-it,cutting-edge,outside the box metheods seem to be working so much better for us,don't they?
Please Caitlain,look around and tell me things are better now than when we took a more conservative approach.
Are you delusional?
- Mike P., Manchester

One has to wonder how you people live with yourselves, knowing that you have to make up statistics to bolster your position when every single study done regarding abstinence-only indoctrination has shown it to be wholly ineffective.
- Caitlain, Fort Lauderdale, FL