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Joe McQuaid: Bank robber clueless, but students show moxie in state beverage battle
By JOSEPH W. MCQUAID
New Hampshire Union Leader Publisher
Monday, Feb. 8, 2010 Share on Facebook
What was that Manchester bank robber thinking last week? He was easy to identify in pictures supplied to us by the police; he did not even bother to pull down his sweatshirt hood to partially cover his face.
Didn't this guy know that if you are going to rob a bank on Elm Street, ManchVegas, you are supposed to tape a tree to your head?
I wonder what became of that tree-headed robber from a few years ago? If he is still in prison, do they let him out for Arbor Day? Is he a Joyce Kilmer fan? Did he read "Roots?" Has he turned over a new leaf? Never mind.
Tree Man would probably vote for apple cider in the current hot debate over what should be New Hampshire's "official" state drink. The meanies who run our editorial page don't think there should be any official drink. Curmudgeons all, they say it is frivolous legislation and the school kids involved in the cider vs. milk fight should not be encouraged to draw up legislation on a whim.
Those egging the kids on (hey, why wasn't eggnog considered?) say it teaches the young sprouts about the legislative process. The curmudgeons say it should teach the kids that each bill costs about a thousand bucks to process.
If the adults want to teach the kids, they might try working on polishing the students' arguments. I wasn't hearing any echoes of Daniel Webster's perorations in the children's testimony last week.
I think we need a bit sterner stuff than the milk backers saying it should be their drink because milk is drunk in school and New Hampshire has dairy farmers; or the cute-as-an-apple kid who said it should be cider because it reminds her of autumn. (Rumor has it that the cider fans want the milk bill voted inexpedient to regurgitate.)
We used to have a lot more orchards and a lot more farmers. We used to make Moxie here, too; but let me hasten to add that I am not pushing for Moxie. That alleged soft drink is what you might call an "acquired taste." Where anyone acquired such a taste, I am clueless. Perhaps it was swilled by the first New Hampshireman to try tripe?
I think a nice local beer or something from the state liquor store would be a better "official" fit for New Hampshire, but I guess that wouldn't work well with the kids' education angle.
Hey, kids, maybe we should have a state breeze!
Now that our record wind atop Mount Washington has been deflated, perhaps the kids could come up with a suitable replacement. Don't look now, but the gales blow pretty hard around and under the State House dome. If I was as smart as a fourth grader, I think I would start there.
Write to Joe McQuaid at publisher@unionleader.com.
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Hey PMT in FL,
This is a satire piece; get over it.
The fact that the bank robber's life is ruined is his own fault; he chose to rob the bank; no one put a gun to his head (no pun intended). Next thing you are going to do is blame society for his robbing of the bank and then demand that he be released immediately and, while you are at it, perhaps he ought to get some of that stimulus money too.
- Bill, Bedford
Joe, I cannot believe they pay you to write this stuff. The man who robbed the bank is a young man in trouble and not to be made fun of as his life is now ruined (I know his family well). Your comments are not funny to us.
- PMT, Florida
Moxie, oh please no Moxie! HA HA.
The memories Moxie dredges up in my head. NH may not have a lot, but we sure got Moxie!
- Jeff, Manchester
Perhaps one of the kids could suggest using legislators that spout ideas such as a state beverage, unwieldy expansion of government powers or a massive budget increase as a source of filling for a hot air balloon. Those people with the crazy ideas could be put in the balloon gondola and the kids can drink cider or milk, their choice, as they watch the buffoons float away. Then we can all grab a drink of our choice and watch our economy start to recover.
- Michael Layon, Derry
Moxie is certainly an acquired taste but, once you've acquired it, no soft drink taste better. Moxie sort of exemplifies our Live Free or Die spirit. It's a great choice.
- John M, Manchester
As a newspaper publisher, you'd expect a fair amount of musing over the variety of brains out there. Seems each one is different and perceives things unlike any other.
That probably is true for the senses, as well. I mean is red, or green, exactly the same for everybody? I doubt it.
Taste certainly must be on the tongue and in the brain of the beholder. Meaning there is as many identifiable things that could qualify as state drink as could be put in a blender and hit overdrive - which is what I figured happened when Moxie was first concocted.
Now, that's got me to thinking...
- RP, New Boston
I say let water be the state drink. With that said I say Moxie would be my second choice followed by milk/apple cider.
Water is my choice it good for you and everything is maded with water. This way we can promote clean water and health body. Even Jesus was baptism with water thing about it.
- mo, plymouth
Moxie is indeed an acquired taste. Unfortunately for the under-gifted, it is a taste that can only be acquired by people of higher intelligence. Sorry about that... I do believe they are working on Duhhhh Ale for the rest of you.
- Marc, Derry
It takes a lot of "moxie" to make the official state drink of choice.
Why are we "COTT" up in this ?
Caught, Get It ?
don anderson/marco island, fl.
- don anderson, marco island florida
Moxie is currently owned by a NH Company, but it was originally created by a guy from Maine, and first marketed by him in Massachusetts. I mean, really, he skipped right over us. Sure, a nice cold Moxie has the kick to keep you going, but I'm not sure it'd be right as an "official" drink for NH.
- Dayfd, Manchester
Moxie , is a awesome soda to have every once in a while, t has a unique taste every one should at least try a bottle of it.
Also .. it works as a cocktail too .. instead of a rum and coke .. try a Rum and Moxie ... right Scott ;)
- JP, Raymond,NH
The much loved Moxie is still made in NH. It is proudly bottled by Coca-Cola in Londonderry.
- Steve, Manchester,NH