DEAR ABBY: I left a manipulative and abusive marriage after 18 years. My parents fully supported my decision. When I became engaged to the wonderful man who is now my husband, my mother and many other family members told me that second weddings were “not important” and I should have just gone to the courthouse.

I had a very small wedding. Even my parents didn’t get us a gift. Mom wouldn’t help with planning, either (my husband and I paid for everything), and said I didn’t deserve gifts for a second wedding. All totaled we received five gifts from 50 guests. I didn’t expect anything and was grateful for what we got, but the assumption that this marriage wasn’t important because it is my second hurt me very much. Am I wrong for being so deeply hurt?

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