Some of the following incidents are true. The rest are made up. We report, you decide which is which.
Dear Mr. Publisher: I read in the paper that a New Hampshire man who was at Pearl Harbor during the attack was 18 at the time. Your headline said that was 76 years ago and the story said he was now 96. How can that be?
Dear Reader: As a friend says when we play golf and he misses a putt, “Don’t count that.”
Dear Mr. Publisher: Your Sunday paper sometimes refers to events that happened “earlier this week.” Isn’t Sunday still the first day of the week?
Dear Reader: Reporters are taught the four W’s. Who? What? Where? Why? The fifth W, When?, is vastly overrated.
Dear Mr. Publisher: My paper has been delivered late recently. If I run for Congress, can I count on your support?
Dear Reader: How many subscriptions are you in for?
Dear Mr. Publisher: You used to carry a Sunday column by Garrison Keillor. The commie-libs at the Washington Post dropped his column, so I hope you will, too.
Dear Reader: I think Mr. Keillor got a harsh deal with all the sexual harrassment charges in the headlines. I wrote to him, telling him that if he wished to keep writing just for the Sunday News, I could be his Woody Allen, as in the blacklist film, “The Front.” Haven’t heard back.
Dear Mr. Publisher: Why does the Sunday paper (New Hampshire Sunday News) have a different name than the daily (New Hampshire Union Leader)? And who was Ben Bradlee anyway?
Dear Reader: My father, B.J. McQuaid, and his partner, Blair Clark, started the Sunday News independent of the Union Leader. It lasted two years before being sold to William Loeb’s Union Leader. The Sunday News name was kept because, well, it’s the Sunday News.
P.S.— Ben Bradlee is in the news of late because of a new HBO documentary about him and a new film about the Pentagon Papers. He became famous at the Washington Post (see earlier commie-lib reference) but got his start at the Sunday News. The film will mark the first time Tom Hanks has played someone I knew.
Dear Mr. Publisher: Two years ago, Donald J. Trump said you would be out of business by now. What’s taking you so long?
Dear Reader: I don’t think we ever got that Tweet.
Write to Joe McQuaid at Publisher@unionleader.com or on Twitter at @deucecrew.